I was working in my office and thought I'd just check on her. I looked out the front door no Stella. I put on my shoes and called and didn't see her. So I went to the backyard, looked no Stella. And then the most horrible thought crossed my mind. The ornamental pond. Oh no. I looked in and much to my distress, there lay Stella, motionless.
Amongst tears I carried her to the front yard and screamed at Hubby to come help. I tried to resuscitate her with mouth to mouth. But it was no use, she was gone. I could of kicked myself to tim-buck-too, why an earth did I give her so much freedom? I went round and round in my head -all of the should haves...but nothing would help bring her back.
Then I had to do what was one of the most heart breaking things in my life -tell my daughter when I picked her up from school. She knew something was wrong before I told her because I couldn't stop crying. She thought at first it was Selena because she's our oldest dog. I shook my head no, and said it's your baby. She screamed in disbelief "not my baby", I had to nod and cry with her.
I know time heals and soothes. But today was a hard lesson. We never thought little Stella could get up on the deck and into that pond- but somehow she did. I promise to all my little creatures that I'll do better in the future. I'll do my best to prevent the "I should have's...". If I think there's a chance, then I won't let it happen. Better to err on the side of safety then say I should have.
The pond is now covered in plastic trellis. I can't bare to look at it.